Categories
Sex Education

To LGBT or Not To LGBT?- That is The Question

Sex Education

 

Sex education in schools has always been a topic of fuelled conversation among parents, and opinionated public house frequenters. I found myself within earshot of one such discussion as the question of whether to introduce ‘non-heterosexual’ education to the syllabus should be agreed upon. As half a dozen people voiced their objections I found myself squirming, and biting my tongue for fear of being run out of town with a pitchfork pointing at my posterior.  So, in this space, I would like to share my perfectly valid opinion, and I believe it is a very good one, but I am afraid of real life humans.

 

Children spend a significant number of waking hours in school, it is, therefore, a pretty massive contributor to the education of ‘all things’. Personal and social development is largely influenced by peers and those people in charge of the code of conduct. I can’t help but ask myself, of all those parents who object to the teaching of any matters of Personal, Social and Health Education (PHSE), how many of them take the responsibility on themselves? I was raised (quite poorly) by social worker parents; Sunday lunch was the time for questions and answers of all things sex related. Other children may not have had that privileged start in life, and if we want to avoid the second coming of the trauma of Carrie, kids do need mentors whether you like it or not.

 

The fear? That lessons will take the form of a scene from the Meaning of Life, teacher and wife ‘at it’ in front of the whole class. I know my school days are far behind me but I’m pretty sure that kind of demonstration would be frowned upon even in the 21st Century. Or are you scared your children will be encouraged to have a physical relationship at a young age, because all that talk about orgasms and hormone surges will send them running to the back of the bike sheds? In reality, children of a certain age find ‘all that stuff’ pretty disgusting, because they don’t want to think their parents ever ‘did it’. And, this is not the education we are talking about. We are talking about teaching young people about loving, caring, healthy relationships with people it is legally allowed to have those relationships with.

 

The first step towards an all inclusive curriculum is to get more people writing about the variety of relationships people have with each other (my next move). Under no circumstances should there be any divide between heterosexual and non-heterosexual education. Education should be all encompassing. Let’s talk about humans and human love. We don’t need a breakdown of gender identification, that instantly makes things ‘different’. If sadly, parents object to the  ‘normalisation’ of non- traditional stereotypes, they also need educating.

 

We need diagrams, images, and a long pointy stick. Images of people from all walks of life, demonstrating warm loving interactions. We need to talk about that love between ‘people’, all people. How some of them can make babies the conventional way, and how some have to find alternative ways to complete their loving families. Children start their lives with more compassion, tolerance, and love than most adults will ever have. It is up to us as a society to nurture those personality traits. Rome wasn’t built in a day, but with any luck we will rid ourselves of the racists and bigots, to be fair they will all die out eventually, let the new kids on the block come fighting up the rear and show them how it’s really done. What is normal anyway?

Lisa Ives for Pf Magazine

Categories
humour

I’m Not A Hipster ~ I Just Like Hipster Things

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Coffees served in anything other than a mug, a jam jar, a plant pot, a mason jar, an egg cup, a syringe. The hipsters are taking over.

Avocados. I Had avocados on toast in university in 2010 and nobody cared, Kim Kardashian (insert any other celeb with a low BMI and a big Instagram following) has it and everyone goes batshit crazy, bulk buys them and puts them on everything. I was the original trendsetter but I didn’t shout about it. Come to think of it, why did I bother eating if it wasn’t to document it to strangers and acquaintances. Because I’m greedy, that’s why.

I love a hipster cafe but not everything has to be served on a wooden board and ‘de – constructed’ it’s expensive so can you please ‘construct’ it.

Almond milk, coconut milk, hazelnut milk, soya milk, oat milk. I can’t even slag these off. They are delicious but the concept annoys me, even though my fridge is full of them. It’s as though hipsters just like asking what milk you have to make a point. A secret hipster quiz that only the hipsterist of places will pass. I was in a brunch place recently and was drawn to something described as a turquoise latte. I excitedly asked the waiter what it was. He rolled his eyes and said it was made from algae but when it’s mixed with a plant-based milk it kind of goes blue-ish. No thank you. I had a tea instead.

I ordered a matcha latte once with almond milk and quietly threw up in a corner. It was so pretty, bright green and had the most beautiful latte art on the foamy top but it tasted of pond water mixed with something dead. I like most foods but this was bloody awful. I’m convinced that no one actually likes them. Having said that, I did take a picture to put on my social media.

What happened to just a normal cup of tea? I say that like I don’t walk into a coffee shop asking for an oat milk cortado. Which I do. But I wouldn’t walk into a greasy spoon and ask for avocado on sourdough bread with a coconut flat white. Some places only sell sausages and Lucozade, which is also fine. Just don’t act like a twat when Sue with a tight ponytail, big earrings, and an apron says ‘You what?’ When you want a goji berry and spinach smoothie with spirulina. She’ll think it’s a yeast infection and recommend a thick cream from the pound shop. Sue is fictional but I know id like her.

Sometimes the best things in life are simple but there’s something lovely in turning the simple into a real event. Why not serve a cheese sandwich on a wooden board, or do yoga whilst playing with goats (this is a real thing.) I kind of like the idea of making the normal into something slightly elaborate. For example, if I ever buy a chocolate bar, I won’t scoff it on the train, I’ll wait until I get home, light some candles, make a cup of tea and put my pyjamas on. If I’m going to have those empty calories then I’m going to turn it into something special.

I’m not a hipster, I just like hipster things.

I’m not a hipster but things do sound better on vinyl.

I’m not a hipster but I do have a blog

I’m not a hipster, am I? okay, maybe I’m one matcha latte away from being a hipster and that’s totally fine because they are stomach-churningly disgusting.

Ilaria Passeri for Pf Magazine
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